This is very strange. Everything is going well for me. My relationships with family members and friends is as good as it has ever been. I'm doing a good job at work, making friends, accomplishing tasks. I've even taken some risks and done some new things as of late.
But now I'm wondering, what next? I feel like there is so much I don't know but I have very little way of assessing where I am. It's not even about comparing myself to someone else, or wanting something I don't have. It's more about, am I really reaching my potential? Could I do more? Should I be looking to do more?
Maybe it's a lack of a goal that resonates with me that is the problem. I'm doing a lot of things and making steady progress, but the question is, to what end?
A good example is working out. I'm probably in the best shape I've ever been in currently. But now what? Do I just keep doing what I'm doing, maintaining what I have and maybe continuing to push it up a notch here and there? Or do I try to set some goals with deadlines? Maybe it's more about what speed to operate in.
Maybe that was always the problem before. I was unhappy with where I was, so I wanted everything else to change quicker than it should or maybe than it can. Or I expected more and more from everything, rather than just taking the time to let things develop. Now that I am happy where I am, I should probably "relax and enjoy it". Why rush a change when things are going so well?
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Confused
Posted by ~christophany~ at 2:05 PM
Labels: change, development, life, thoughts
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