Tuesday, September 16, 2008


So I have a new theory about fear. The problem with it is that usually it's based around some misconception or some perception we create that makes whatever we are afraid larger than it really is. Larger in the sense of, harder to overcome, a bigger problem than it really is, or just actually seem physically larger (like a fear of insects).

So when you try to overcome this, the longer you wait the larger it becomes, until you get to the point where it's too large to even think about it. So you push it off or try to focus on something else.

This leads to the problem. The fear has made the task so large that you as an individual can no longer seem to conquer it on your own. So the only way to conquer fear, is to work with someone else. Someone who may have fears of their own, but not the same fears that you have. This is why expanding your social circle or experiencing something new is so vital, because it forces you to alter your perspective and it helps to shrink fears back to reality.

Growing up, my parents were never ones to ask for help. Maybe on occasion they would have certain people they would call on for specific tasks, but when it came to new problems they were all about tackling it on their own. In observing them, I picked up this trait. While I feel like I've developed into a capable individual, learning how to ask others for help is a necessary skill that I was lacking and am only now learning to develop.

Asking others for help is a tool for breaking down barriers, building relationships, and presenting other people with an opportunity to feel useful and helpful. We all have our own individual strengths and weaknesses, by understanding that and overcoming the pride that prevents us from reaching out to others, we helps create a chain of growth and opportunity. I've found from personal experience that any thoughts or actions that help us to feel connected to other people around us cannot be bad, but those that create a sense of isolation only lead to negative recourse.

This all sounds like common sense, and I'm sure it is, but sometimes it's hard to look at our own lives and see what mistakes we are making. Being too close to the action makes it difficult to see the alternative paths that we miss out on.

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