So everyone has something. Maybe you don't know what it is yet, but you have something, some little defect that makes you who you are. It could be OCD, it could be an eating disorder, it could be any number of things. But it's something. I have Depression.
It seems that the current theory is that my new passive trend may just be the first step towards a seasonal relapse into a Depressed state.
I thought I had beat this. I work out so that I'm in good shape. I changed my diet so that I get Vitamin D and I even take fish oil supplements for the Omega 3. I keep a pretty strict sleep schedule.
I can't even write about this.
I'm probably bipolar, since that's what my great grandmother was. That nervous energy I wrote about is probably a manic state that just recently came to an end and now comes the depression state.
I hate this.
I guess we'll see.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Progress or Depression
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As a follow up to this, I'm starting to think that I'm not depressed. I remember what it's like to be depressed, and I just don't think that's how I am, currently at least.
I feel like my mood is effected by the people I spend my time with, and sometimes I spend time with some pretty depressing people, esp people who like to rub in that they are in a relationship with PDA right in front of me. But I also have a lot of awesome friends who really make me feel great.
I think I just need to shift my focus and activities more towards the positive people because I feel like I naturally want to be positive, but it gets too hard to stay happy and positive around depressing people. It's even worse when I'm already having a borderline day or tired from work.
Too many people like to crap on your happy.
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